When my kids were younger they attended a camp that taught them the “I’m Third” mentality. I believe they try to practice that now that they are older and I am so glad! God first, others second and self last. A servant’s mentality is a sure way to help you find fulfillment and happiness. It is important to consider other’s needs before your own.

Looking out for the needs of others, however, does not mean that it is not also important to have a measured and realistic view of your own worth. C.S.Lewis, in speaking about the dangers of pride, felt that to think “I’m no more special than anyone else” was not the best way to approach humility. A better approach was to think “everyone is as special as me.” Lift everyone up. Don’t put down. Each one of us is unique. One of a kind. Each of us is created in the image of a God who is beyond our wildest, but limited imagination. We are SO SPECIAL! Recognizing how special we are is healthy.

Mental health is not promoted by false humility, self put downs, or reminding one’s self of one’s shortcomings. It is improved by admiring your own progress and accomplishments. When you work hard and produce a good product, or promote a good cause, there is nothing wrong with congratulating yourself. Do your very best, and then admire what you have done. Nothing wrong with that! Admiring the glory of a sunset is healthy. But the sunset tonight does not diminish yesterday’s sunset. And your worth does not diminish your neighbors. I really believe that we do not value ourselves or each other enough. We certainly do not need to value ourselves less. We need to value others more.

While we are admiring ourselves, in order to have the greatest mental health and stability, we also must remember that we cannot take credit for ourselves by ourselves. No one is self-made. We are created. We reflect the glory of our creator. We are not the sun but reflect the light. So let us lay aside our impurities, work hard to better reflect the glory of our God and let the potential within shine!

I, like many others, suffer from neck pain. Oftentimes the neck pain can lead to a severe headache. According to a recent article in Surgical Technology International, unhealthy posturing due to cell phone usage may be one of the culprits. According to KENNETH K. HANSRAJ, MD, the increased flexion of the neck during cell phone usage greatly increases the stress on the cervical spine.   See https://cbsminnesota.files.wordpress.com/2014/11/spine-study.pdf

The weight experienced by the spine greatly increases as the neck flexes forward. If the head tilts forward 15 degrees the cervical spine sees a force of 27 pounds. At 30 degrees that increases to 40 pounds and at 60 degrees it surges to 60 pounds. That is how I feel after I have been bent over for a while. It is as if I have had a 60 pound weight on my neck. Now I find out that the reason I feel like that is because it is true!

Figure 1 – Neck flexion. Hansraj, KK MD. Assessment of stresses in the cervical spine caused by posture and position of the head. Surgical Technology International 2014; 25 (277-279).

What can be done about this? It is not practical to avoid a cellphone.  You might as well try to avoid needing food. But there are a few improvements and adjustments that can be implemented.

1. Use good posture as often as possible (your ears should be above your shoulders and your shoulder blades retracted)

2. Make sure your pillow at night gives you a healthy alignment

3. If you work on a computer screen, practice good ergonomics

4. Avoid carrying heavy bags on your shoulders

5. When you develop neck pain, icing and heat and gentle massage may be helpful.

And of course, there is always the option of fewer video games on your phone and using the speaker mode when talking!!

LOVER OF SELF
LOVER OF MONEY
PROUD
ARROGANT
SLANDEROUS
SWOLLEN WITH CONCEIT
RECKLESS

According to 2 Timothy 3:2-5 such people should be avoided!

WHICH PUBLIC FIGURE COMES TO MIND WHEN YOU READ THIS LIST?

On the eve of a new year I am reminded of God’s mercy built into our life. He lets us start over again and again. His mercies are new every morning. Every day there are disappointments and mistakes, and 2016 will not be any different. There will be thrills and there will be ills. Struggles and victories. There will be falling down, but there will be getting up!

The seasons and the passing years are reminders of both the transiency and possibilities of life on this planet. The years are adding up for me. There are fewer ahead on this earth than behind. My list of goals, however, just keeps getting longer! What I hope to change, though, is the focus of my “TO DO” list. I absolutely still want to be the perfect weight and run a marathon. I definitely still want to become a gourmet cook. I really desire to learn to speak Spanish and want to play a guitar. In a fit of realism, I have crossed becoming an astronaut off of my list, but nothing else!! Yet, more and more, I realize those are things to pursue within a larger and more permanent framework. What will last forever are souls. Relationships with other souls. Relationship with my creator. Family and friends are more important than my “TO DO” list. Time spent doing even mundane and trivial pursuits with them is more important than a completely checked off list.

So for this coming year, though I am not ready to give up my “TO DO” LIST, I am tweaking it a little. I want to focus more on what is most important. This body I am residing in – at least my creaking knees, and various other parts -are reminding me that they are not permanent. My sagging skin (which seems permanent) is so distressing! (Will someone PLEASE invent a wrinkle eraser?). What is really going to last forever? That is where I want to focus. I want to pursue what has eternal value. With that in mind, I resolve to touch other people’s lives more. I resolve to share more of my time and my possessions. I will listen more. I will try to hear what is not being said. I will try to speak less with words and more with actions This year I need less of me!!

Jesus says that eternal life is to KNOW Him. Eternal life is definitely on my list. So I am moving TIME SPENT with God and others to the top of my list. Removing wrinkles is still there but will have to wait. All of my other goals are still there also…. they are just moved further down.

This Christmas, amidst all of the hustle and bustle, I want to remember the real meaning of this celebration.
I am thankful for parents, siblings, children and friends…but I want to say thank you to the one closest to me.

1. You are closer to me than a brother ever could be

2. You have loved me when I behave and when I do not

3. You have always given me wise advice whenever I ask

4. You have sworn to always look after me

5. You care for my family and friends and want them to know you

6. You always offer to share your riches with me

7. You know me better than I know myself

8. You listen to my every concern, big or small

9. You do not look the other way when I do something wrong, but always seek to put me back on the right path

10. You died for me

With all my heart,
I thank you.

I love you.

If you listen to the media these days there is a constant theme. Be alert. Watch your neighbor and those around you. If anything or anyone looks suspicious point it out to a law enforcement officer. Well, I understand the thinking behind this but I think there is a healthier way to change our culture. I agree that we need to be alert. We need to watch the behavior of others, but for a completely different reason and with a completely different purpose. What would happen to our society if we all were trying to catch one another in the act of doing something good? So much good is done quietly behind the scenes. Quiet people doing what needs to be done….taking care of the elderly, feeding homeless, supporting all varieties of charity, reading to kids, all without any recognition. Moms and dad who stay up all night with sick children and then still go to work. Teachers who go the extra mile and purchase school supplies for their classroom with their own money. Nurses who help patients retain their dignity when no one else is looking. The list is endless…..so why,oh why, do we not focus on these things? We rarely say thank you. We just take all this for granted. If something evil happens it has all the attention of the media! It is not that it should not be reported, but the laser focus on what is bad in our society and the total blackout about what is good is something none of us should tolerate. The media only cares about what sells. They do not care about our safety or our mental health. So lets send a message about what sells. Turn off the bad news after hearing it once…after all, that is all you need to know. And if you ever see a good news story, send an email to whatever network aired it and say thank you!

Why can we not suspend commercialism in America, even for 24 hours, in order to focus on the blessings we already have? What has happened to Thanksgiving? How we have strayed from the original meaning of this holiday. It does not portend well for this nation that we are so focused on getting that we cannot sit still and be grateful for what we already have. Especially in a time when many in other lands have lost their homes and even their homeland. They have lost loved ones. They have lost careers. They are displaced and in danger and need so much. How grateful those people would be to sit in a well furnished home, enjoying an abundance of culinary delights with their family? Would they rush to leave that table and run to a store? I think not. Perhaps we should not either!

A long time ago I learned that there was a big difference between a peacekeeper and a peacemaker. They can look similar, but they are in fact very different entities.

 
PEACEKEEPERS are people who love peace…. perhaps too much. They have a distaste for conflict that will cause them to tolerate all manner of wrongdoing and injustice. Often they are willing to do whatever it takes to avoid a disagreement or fight. Peace is the ultimate goal, not righteousness. Not fairness. Not justice. They are often willing to ignore or tolerate evil, feeling that maintaining order is more important.

PEACEMAKERS also love peace, but realize that lasting peace cannot coexist with evil. There are times when some disruption or conflict is necessary to set things right. There are times when you have to fight for what is right. Peace is not worth any price. Peace will not last unless it is resting on a foundation of fairness and justice. It must be built on a foundation of righteousness. That is why “giving in” to something or someone who is doing something wrong, though it may delay a conflict, will usually in the end make that conflict worse. Tolerating evil and injustice is short sighted. Fighting against these elements, in the short run, can be very uncomfortable, but in the end will lead to a more lasting peace.

The principles of PEACEKEEPING vs PEACEMAKING apply both to our own individual lives and also to the lives of nations. America needs to stand for righteousness if she wants to be a peacemaker. Tolerance of everything may gain an illusion of peace for a short time, but the day will come when both the peace we have enjoyed and our freedoms will crumble. Worse yet, I fear, is that we will no longer have the the moral stamina or fortitude to fight for what is right and true. We will be another example that “if you stand for nothing you will fall for anything.”

What we desperately need are peacemakers, not peacekeepers. Evil is real in this world. Only by standing for what is right…for righteousness…will we be able to look forward to lasting peace. The battles are everywhere. We were victims on 9/11 of a real evil. France was a victim of real evil a few days ago. There is real evil on our campuses, on our streets, and in our own hearts. Individually, and as a nation, we must decide on which side we will stand. I do not believe that we will be able to stay neutral. We can stay quiet and try to keep the peace, but in the end, if we do not fight for what is right, the evil will come. Peacekeeping does not work. You must make peace by fighting for what is right! In the book of Matthew, Jesus says “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God” Where, oh where, are the sons of God in America?

The picture in this post shows siblings. They are ‘black and white’ fraternal twins. Same parents!! The truth shown in this photograph says more than all of the divisive rhetoric swirling around us of late. There is one race…the human race. I am SO TIRED of all the talk about skin color. I do not know why everyone else is not exhausted by it too. Or maybe they are, but afraid to say so.

My eyes are green. My hair is brown (well, ok…gray colored brown) My nails are painted pink. My skin is…….does it matter? Do you want to know the color of my skin? Is it more important than the color of my eyes? The eyes are the window of the soul! The color of my skin is just not that important.

So how can we move forward? We desperately need to move beyond the superficial judging of people. I am all for celebrating one’s ancestry and heritage. It is fun to know from whence you came. But there are saints and scoundrels in all of our pasts. There is saint and scoundrel in each of us! And in America we are a melting pot….we just are not melting together too well lately. Our differences are crystallizing us into separate little islands of discontent. We have so much to be thankful for together in this country….enough of the negativity already! I am an American, descended from immigrants from a foreign land where there skin color was…..mostly similar to mine.